Flying Pigs and Eating Crows

Its pretty difficult for most people to admit that they were misinformed, misguided, or just plain wrong.... myself included! Consider this me eating crow about how I was completely wrong about feminism, and that the world is-right now- just as it should be. And yes... that was a pig flying by your apartment window ;)

WOW! How could I be so wrong about a gender balance that favors men? Women can be anything they want to be. With the right motivation and education can't we all?

Facts:

• Since 1964, male voters outnumbered female voters in every presidential election.
• BJ Gallagher (author of "The World's Best Advice from the World's Wisest Man) says men make great bosses because they are 
• better coachers 
• better mentors
• better problem solvers
• Men hold 98 of 535 (18%) seats in the 113th Congress
• 79 House Representative are male 
• 20 Senators (plus 3 delegates) are men 
• Of the 100 largest American Cities, 12 have male mayors.
• Men have better aim throwing a baseball at all ages.
• 2012 elections saw 5 male state governors elected.
• multitasking test had 50 men and 50 women do four tasks in 8 minutes: results show men better able to reflect on problems while also doing others tasks 
• men are better at multitasking
• James Flynn is a researcher that found the IQs of men in the US, Europe, Canada are higher than women's
• men are smarter
• Bureau of Labor Statistics says that since the Recession hit in 2007, 80% of the workers who lost their jobs were women.
• men are recession proof
• Harvard Business Review recently published a study on male to female leadership ability. The study says that leadership is quantified by 16 central personality traits
•  men are judged to be better than women on 12 of the traits (10 showed a statistical significance). 
• men better leaders
• Men are judged in employee evaluations to be more positively perceived at:
• Executive Management (Men 57, Women 52) 
• Senior Managers (Men 56, Women 50) 
• Middle Managers (55 Men, 51 Women).
• US Census Burea says 17 million men and 12 million women live in poverty in the United States, which is the highest level since 1993.
• Rothstein Kass finance shows that male hedge fund managers outperform female competition.
• 48% of all men experience psychological aggression in their lifetime
• 37% of families led by single fathers nationwide live in poverty.
• only 6.8% of married parent families do (2009 Heritage Foundation Study)

Clearly, men make better leaders, are smarter, and are generally more valuable and have more to offer than women in the workplace. Most of you shouldn't be surprised... Americans just "know" these facts to be true: males as a group are supreme to the weaker, more fragile feminine sex.

April Foolsssss :)

All the above "truths?" Just replace every man/male/masculine word from the above quotes with woman/female/feminine to switch the statement. Every single fact originally was written to be the exact opposite...for example "37% of families led by single mothers nationwide live in poverty" is the true information.

They are exactly opposite of what the data from many studies are finding when comparing the average man to the average woman.

As in- studies are showing that women in general have more leadership skills, higher IQs, vote more,  are rated higher in employee evaluations, and are more educated as a group than male peers.

Surprised yet?

How can a congress of 82% rich white men know anything about making laws that govern the contraceptive and maternity rights of 51% of the population? It can't.

Although feminism is geared to helping girls and women reach the equality that males are privileged with from birth, feminism at its core promotes equality of all people regardless of gender, sex, race, or class. The movement is about not about being better than men, its about women being valued by the world as more than a "slam-piece;" more valuable than the sum of her curves. Women are human, too.

I hate to have tricked you reader, but with all the "Men's Rights Movement" propaganda floating around, I wanted to make sure you realize that we all still need feminism. I am so about helping men-central issues like the high suicide rate of teen boys, the male problem of homelessness, and the constant societal pressure to be an alpha male. Such a shame that legitimate concerns like the above (and many more) are being ignored to solely bring down the feminist movement.

Make tomorrow better,
Brooke

WORDS words WORDS: Bossy Brooke no More

There is this idea I encounter quite frequently whenever I dare to correct someone who has called me "chick" or "sugar" or "babe" that I do indeed have a name that is not an animal, baking commodity, nor child, that efforts toward gender equality is "finished" and "is not necessary any longer." That there is no "white, rich, old man conspiracy group" that does nothing beyond "sitting around smoking cigars and plotting oppression tactics."

This is true. There is no systematic devaluation of the female person by an institution such as... oh idk..... PRINT & DIGITAL & CINEMATIC MEDIA. 
or..... RELIGION.
or..... SCHOOLS.
or..... RAPE CULTURE.

Yes, women in 2014 are now "allowed" to request a divorce, vote, wear jeans, go to college, work outside of the home.... but by NO means is the necessity of women's rights activists eliminated. Its been 40 years since the second wave of the Feminist Revolution, 40 years since equal opportunities for both sexes were demanded-by law- to be provided in educational settings that receive federal funding.... and yet there are, according to 2013 datas:

So true!

• 23 Fortune 500 female CEOs
• FIVE (of 50) female state governors
• the 113th congress has TWENTY female senators (of 100) and 99 of (535) female house members... don't get excited thats 18%.
• Nancy Pelosi is the first EVER female Speaker of the House
• what about newspaper editors? movie directors? school board members? 

The list goes on and on because this is an epidemic.

Yes, simultaneously there is SLOW progress: the fact that Hillary Clinton (a woman in general, not JUST her) may very well be the next president is SUCH greatness and speaks to how we have grown in our thinking.... Except that we call her Hillary. And we judge her hair. And she's "getting older." How disrespectful! No one goes around (perhaps a little bit...but not like this) saying Barak or Paul. Because we respect them. Because we are comfortable with male leadership.

But to say these numbers are acceptable? That we have reached "equality"? That feminism is offensive to men because women are "taking over" and being "helped too much now"? That women do not want to be associated with being a "feminist" because they aren't hairy legged butch lesbians that want to kill all men and store a few under ground for reproduction purposes.... Am I those things? No. I do not want to take over the world. But I AM demanding a better world for my daughters AND sons, and I would like your eyes to be open to the situation.

Yes some women want to be stay at home mothers, and yes some have education degrees, and yes some simply do not WANT to be a person in power because of the stress/time/effort/ect. This is perfectly okay, and I am happy they are living their idea of happy..... But the numbers are not made sensical by such trivial explanations.

Women are 51% of the population, and half of all degrees have gone to women over the last 30 years.... some, of course, are teachers and other professions who are not "qualified" educationally wise to be in power..... but shouldn't logic tell you that the other factors contributing to the male power majority such as the "stay at home moms" and the "ladies who lunch" who simply do not work be statistically balanced by the large group of men who are janitors? Or construction workers? Or ranchers? 18% of house members being female isn't acceptable. Its not representative of the population dynamics nor the values that 51% of the population is affected by more so than the 49%.

I am sure you have heard about Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg's new initiative, in unison with the Girl Scouts, to ban the word bossy from the vocabulary of parents and teachers. The idea is that girls in classrooms are enthusiastically answering questions and being "classroom helper", then being told to stop being so bossy and loud and to let others take a turn. The little girls are embarrassed; no longer will they find the joy in learning as before, and the will to lead is, if not STOLEN, then greatly diminished. Yes, there are some certain girls who can brush the idea of being too assertive off and move on. But what about the ones that cannot? Who give up right there? Who maybe don't have the parents at home to say "you CAN do anything a boy can do" or "don't let those kids bring you down!"?

Too bad so sad?

How can we move forward if 51% of us are not?

Women will LIE about how much they make on dates in order to not be too "dominating" to men and in order to preserve their tender, fragile masculinity.... why is this even a thought? Why are women not shouting from the rooftops about their accomplishments that yes they EARNED that raise working 60 hours a week? Why not telling the dinner party that they KICKED ASS and earned a big client contract? Some do. But a lot of women constantly undermine accomplishments to partners, friends, and families by phrases like

"oh, well, you know.... I just was lucky and the timing worked out....."

"well, yeah, i mean..... there were not many applicants, so I didn't have much competition...." 

Do you think men do that? No. Because men are "supposed to be" in those positions (as evidenced by history, so its what we culturally expect) and they are taught from the start of their lives that alpha male powerful is what you want in order to support a family, and to also not be the wimpy kid that gets beat up.

I have also heard that men do what they do to impress women: win wars, be a wall street guy, whatever "it" is, the act is used to earn sexual advantages over less capable competition; those cannot be advantageous if you did not "earn" the accomplishment... "right place right time" isn't very sexy. If you didn't brag to the world, how would the ladies know?  But I cannot say if that is absolute fact.

Sandberg's idea is this early negative experience with exhibiting leadership skills is what drives these women in the future to not seek out managerial positions: "I don't want to be the bitch." Her hypothesis is that this is why more women are not upper management positions: 13 years of tongue biting to "play nice" with the other kids and not step on any toes does not build the life skills necessary to BE a good leader. The kind of skills like being comfortable giving directions (not orders) instead of asking "hey when you get a moment can you please do ______."

Both physically and mentally, boys mature later than girls. Should the faster progressing girls (and boys, if they are) be oppressed to make room for the lagging behind boys and slower girls? Wouldn't our country benefit socially, economically et. if the best of the best gets treated like it instead of being handicapped? If said late bloomers aren't on the same "level," I feel that those kids should be held back a year to progress themselves.

Arguments AGAINST the #banbossy campaign say that both genders are called it, its not that relevant, and there are bigger things to worry about that hurting a 7 year old child's feelings. Forbes's contributor Michelin Maynard (a woman) wrote an article on the matter saying

"We don't have to ban words to make young girls feel better. Instead, teach them to believe in possibilities, no matter what anyone says about them, and keep finding ways to move forward."

Considering that Title 9 of the Education Amendments of 1972 says

"No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving federal finical assistance."

I beg to differ. It is not about "feeling better" its about facilitating an environment where ideas and life skills and learning thrives; the people that work the hardest and are the brightest get rewarded, not punished. A world where school dress codes DON'T teach girls that wearing shorts, even of appropriate length, are wrongfully stimulating to those poor dear boys. It is funny that "bermuda shorts" are acceptable which are very comparable to male cargo or basketball length shorts. So THAT is ok, but girls you should know that your bodies are disgraceful and not acceptable for public arenas, and it is your responsibility to fight off the middle school pubescent advances of boys; boys, don't worry, we will shield your little eyes.

What does it mean to be equal? In my very clearly subjective opinion, equality of the sexes would be a world where gendered ideology beyond the biologically based reproductive systems (like maternity and paternity leave, the right to not be fired for being pregnant ect.) is eliminated.

An actual ad for a butcher shop. Looks like you matter a lot ladies

Linguistics is a cultural snapshot that serves to reflect the thinking in a moment in time. For example, before the civil rights movement, "nigger" was an acceptable name for a black person; today, that is a word most people would never, ever use in a derogatory sense. When we speak, the words we say are evidence of our own thinking patterns, and are also shading the connotations that other people around you hear and then link to the associated groups in question, both positively and negatively.

Sexism is another construct validated and affirmed through word choice; how men and boys speak and see others speak influences their ideology. For instance, in a perfect world, little boys who enjoy painting are not called sissies as an insult. It is a negative thing to be a sissy but a positive thing for the girl that loves kickball and climbing trees to be a tom-boy because of the value we culturally place on male traits compared to female traits. To be more male-like is valued, to be more female-like is embarrassing.

What about being told to "man up," to "grow a pair," or that someone who IS what a real man should be, perhaps man enough to walk away from a fight "doesn't have any balls." Are these attributes intrinsically positive? NO. To imply that the male sexual organ is a metaphor for success isn't acceptable. It would be different if there was a similar, positive vibe surrounding lady parts; but nah, not needed.

 The female sexual organs gets all the negative connotations that phrases like "stop being a pussy" and "What? Are you on your period today?" bring to mind in situations of failure; "Need a tampon" is yet another linked to actions that are something that YOU as a man are above and better than I as a woman. The "most" offensive word in the entire english language is cunt..... a word meaning vagina. This is not oh men and women are different, or the "separate but equal" idea by any means, its the idea that male is something to embrace and flaunt because its better than female.

Interesting point on that: considering that the male organs are external, thus extremely prone to injury (true story. I've seen many a male doubled over in pain due to a testes tap), and the female organs are internal and capable of oh ya know.... growing a human being from fluids and then bringing new life into the world, you would think the anything related to "balls" and "big dicks" would be extremely weak. But its not. Because "any old animal can pop out a kid."

Because we value masculinity, as a society, at the expense of femininity.

Its a rape hotline ad.... for BIG MACS.

What about the VERY common usage of "raping" as a synonym for "winning:" "I just raped that test;" football coaches saying how we're gonna "rape that team;" the very most disgusting, dehumanizing act of forcefully stealing a woman's (and very very rarely a man's) dignity and killing a piece of who they were, forever tainting their view that maybe the world is a good place, an act that HAPPENS EVERY SINGLE DAY ....is glorified. An act that is RARELY served jail time for (15 out of 16 will not says Rape Abuse, and Incest National Network),  that is thought of as "not really a thing anymore," an act that is just a risk of happening to be female. Rape also happens to simply go away with money or power  because all you have to say is "she was drunk and she consented and she changed her mind." ... This CRIME means winning and being the victor in our culture.

We don't teach "hey boys! don't rape it's wrong!" we teach "hey girls! you are weak and a victim so don't walk alone, don't drink too much, don't let a guy pick you up for a date cause then he will know where you live, don't run at night time because you are a walking target."  Yes, it is my responsibility to be smart, but it is NOT my responsibility to guard my every move such as hiring a corp escort to walk me across campus after studying late. Men and boys are responsible.

A Brown School of Medicine 2010 study found that 91%.... NINETY ONE PERCENT....of all rapes are committed by undetected repeat offenders. Maybe that has something to do with the CBS investigation in 2009  that found in TEXAS... where we live people.... there is 10,000 untested rape kits in Dallas, 3,000 in Houston, and another 5,000 untested kits in San Antonio. Google it. I promise. EIGHTEEN THOUSAND women, in Texas, in Cities we have both likely been to.... these 18,000 just simply do not matter enough to get justice for.... Are you disgusted yet? It is estimated that of every 100 rapes, only 40 get reported. Do the math.

This is deeply engrained, culturally acceptable promotion of the inferiority of women. Question it. Demand answers. And change the world for the better for both MEN AND WOMEN. who possess their different strengths and weaknesses. Where the problem arises is when the differences are not valued; that is the definition of 3rd wave feminism.

So tell me again how we're "all equal."
That America is land of the free, home of brave; a land of equal opportunity.
That you "aren't a feminist."
That you "don't see a reason for it"

Think of the 5% of CEOs and the 18% of house members and the 20% of senators and the five total female governors.

Then think of those 18,000 women and the 18,000 rapes and the 18,000 men (maybe less...repeat offenders remember.) who will never do a second of time for their brutal, life-changingly traumatic, soul crushing hate crime against women IN TEXAS.

And then tell me you aren't a feminist.

Brooke

Using the F-word in Public

And no, not the one you're thinking.
Please hear me out before you just dismiss this as another femi-nazi rant.

If you know me, you've probably heard me say something about being a woman, being taken seriously, and being treated with the respect that men are granted freely. I believe in equality: I am not better nor worse than a man, but with different strengths AND weaknesses. To claim that I am a FEMINIST-- however-- makes people uncomfortable. If a misogynist means someone who hates women, then would a feminist be someone who LOVES women?

I don't understand why this is something negative?

Power heels like a boss

I personally, right this second, know multiple women who let their boyfriends:

• beat them
• degrade them 
• control their money 
• restrict their access to their friends and families 
• tell them what they are/aren't allowed to do/say/think

It is for them that I can not and I will not smile and say that, yes, women being "allowed" to have jobs and vote is enough. It's more than that-- its challenging ourselves and those around us to change how we view girls and women. 

Being a feminist means being a voice for the women who can't or won't speak for themselves. We must teach our girls that being opinionated isn't being "bossy;" its showing potential leadership ability early; its being more than a doormat. Little girls NEED to hear that they deserve to be loved, to make their own choices, and to be respected. To DEMAND respect if they must.

 Can you imagine a guy telling me what to do? To quote Drake's The Motto, "Wish a nigga would." 

Our boys need to be taught that being a REAL man isn't being controlling- its respecting the women in his life, and walking away from anger rather than resorting to violence. Its knowing that by his strength, of course he could control any woman he chooses to, but being a MAN means choosing love and respect over threats and intimidation. 

 Maybe you're thinking,

"Brooke- I'm all for respecting women and my boyfriend doesn't beat me.... I still don't need feminism? It doesn't apply to me?"

Theres a 3ish minute Miss Representation video at the bottom of the page you should check out;  its pretty entertaining, and is clips of different news anchors and advertisements from 2013.

Here's a few of the best quotes:

• Rush Limbaugh on Beyonce and Jay Z,  "She married the rich guy, she understands its worth it to bow down." (because its not like she's successful on her own or anything...)
• Joan Rivers on Adele, "You know that song 'Rolling in the Deep?' Yeah, she should have added 'fried chicken.' "
• "I'm not saying you deserve to be raped, but..." (?????????????????)
• CNN's headline about the Steubenville Rapists says they "have a promising future and are very good students" (ummm? no jail time?)
• Male to female news anchor on the hannity show "Know your role and shut your mouth"
• Multiple references to women in power being dismissed as "hysterical" and "too emotional" when speaking logically and using facts to win arguments

We have came a very long way from sitting at home and vacuuming in pearls, but if you think you don't need feminism, because the world will treat you correctly--- I guess you must be doing something these world class athletes, politicians, reporters, and entertainers are not. 

Being pro-woman isn't being anti-man. By reading the above, however, its clear that to be female is NOT to be respected, and that is the root of the problem.

Our female senators get dismissed as "chemically imbalanced" by their colleagues and it. must. stop. Our female professional athletes are reported as "not very pretty" in the news, as if that is their job or focus. Superbowl performer BEYONCE is dismissed as "bowing down" to her husband as the reason for her success. Very gifted, Grammy award winner Adele is judged specifically on her weight.

Women can't voice their opinions without being dismissed as "moody" or told to "stop being so sensitive." Until this changes, and I can get the respect that my male peers do, I won't stop talking about it. If you don't feel the same, I really would like to know why.

"Challenge the negatives and amplify the positives"

Think about it,

Brooke